dun regret what u had decided.

once a decision is made, it cannot be revert back, especially major decisions.

i was stupid. i was dumb. i was childish.

all these points above made me make every decision solely on my emotions.
those were the times when i was in sec 2 or 3, naive and sickening.
right now, i dare not say how mature i am but i can be little confident to say that i will not make any decision solely base on my emotions in future.

as what i had said, every decision can affect you in every way. it can be a bad one or a good one and it is only depend on how you cogitated before u make that decision. apparently, i had made a wrong one.....

that wrong turn had thrown me into a world where endless envious , jealousy , devastation and the yearning of love to be haunting me everyday. i was wrong about my decision and i can no longer revert back no matter how much i desire.

about my decision, i cannot share it with you all but the main thing is not to make the wrong the decision.

i hate the feeling of regret. especially during late at night, when I am lying on my bed and shrouded by darkness. during that moment, this feeling suddenly have the ability to dig out my deepest fear and i was rendered to be terrified. i sat up and covered myself with my blanket and i started to shudder. memories/flashback started playing like a movie in my mind and i as if feel myself setting into that moment like going back to the past. i was back to that crux moment of making my decision and if i were to able to alter history, especially during that moment, i think that my life now will be a 360 change, a good one to be precise.

i detest how our brain works. it is said that the most memorable things that can leave a mark on your brain is memories of devastation and agony. btw this information was adapted from the recent comprehension. actually, this sentence about only devastation and agony is able to linger on, actually also means that '' happiness does not linger in our mind long'' and it is a shame....

indeed, my mind is now overwhelmed with all these stuff and all the happy memories seems to have evaporated from my mind. happiness is such a fleeting and unrealistic emotion....

dun regret....